The Faster Lane / Tyler Brûlé
Mule variations
On a recent flight to Dubai, shortly after the meal service had ended, the last coffees and liqueurs had been poured and the final emails of the business day sent, I reached for the remote control in the side console and decided to watch a film or short series before touchdown. But what to watch? In the US, many airlines are doing away with in-flight entertainment as they believe that everything you need to watch or listen to is available via your smartphone. In so many ways, this goes against not only the magic of a good flying experience but also the sense of discovery when an airline (or its service partner) puts some extra effort into selecting the best in Spanish thrillers, South Korean dramas or never-to-be-seen-again nominees from obscure alpine film festivals. I decided to scroll through the A to Z of film offers and stopped occasionally to view a trailer or read a short synopsis. On the first pass I paused on EO as I’d read positive reviews and noted that it had done well at Cannes and stars a donkey. Should I try to watch something else and then end on EO? Or just go for it and not hold off as this was something of a Friday-evening gift at 10,000 metres above the Black Sea.
I hit play, asked for my wine glass to be topped up and settled in for what I thought would be a sunny, happy romp through the Polish countryside. Wrong! At 12 minutes in I was already holding back the tears (there are at least two more scenes that will have viewers welling-up) and it should be noted that just because this is the story of life seen from the point of view of a handsome donkey, it’s not meant for anyone under the age of 16. If I was in charge of film ratings and general appreciation of life, then I’d say 21-plus for sure. Let me add that this is not a film for happy, Easter Sunday vibes.
I rubbed his muscular neck and stroked his beardy chin, and he strained against the wooden beams for more
I won’t give away the story but it’s fair to say that most of humanity does not come off well through the eyes of Eo, the donkey, and you tumble into the credits with thoughts of either giving away all of your life’s earnings to your local donkey-rescue charity or daydreaming about abandoning your current life, buying a plot of land in Portugal, Greece or Spain and building an architecturally outstanding compound for 15 to 20 donkeys to lead perfect lives with plenty of grooming, easy chores and all the other things that donkeys are into.
On Friday, I arrived at one of my favourite retreats in Europe, if not the world. São Lourenço do Barrocal is an estate in Portugal’s Alentejo region that attracts a certain type of customer – one who likes the wide-open landscape, the property’s outstanding wine cellar and produce grown on the surrounding terrain, the elegantly spare, “Made in Portugal” interiors and Jerónimo the donkey. Shortly after I arrived, en route to the pool, I went to check in on Jerónimo. He was lying in the sun, his enormous ears flicking away flies, and he seemed to be in deep concentration. I figured that he was gearing himself up for his much-publicised Easter assignment involving carting children around the property in search of various hidden treats. I watched him for a while and then set off for the pool.
Later in the afternoon, on my way back to the room, I swung by Jerónimo’s enclosure and he was standing in the shade. I approached the fence and Jerónimo did the same. I rubbed his muscular neck and stroked his beardy chin, and he strained against the wooden beams for more. A little later, I went back to say hello with my mom (she said that she’s going to paint Jerónimo’s portrait) and returned again at the end of the day to see what he was up to. Naturally, donkey stuff. Jerónimo doesn’t seem to have a lot of big concerns: he lives in an idyllic setting, gets plenty of attention, has a few projects, keeps the neighbouring horses calm and bellows out a throaty “eeee-awww” every few hours to remind everyone that he’s at the centre of the compound and he’s having a grand old time being a well-mannered Portuguese donkey. Eo would have been very happy sharing quarters with Jerónimo here at Barrocal.