THE FASTER LANE / TYLER BRÛLÉ
Open plan
Achtung! Attenzione! Caution! You’re about to enter complicated territory, so please proceed with extra care. I say this because if you’ve been confined to the same city, municipality, state or country for the past year then you could be in for a shock when you start to venture back out into the big wide world.
On Thursday I jumped on the train to Chiasso (the last main rail stop in Switzerland before crossing into Italy) and was pleased that it was one of SBB’s shiny new Stadler Girunos: smart interior, good connectivity, spotless and silent. Two hours and 15 minutes later I jumped off at Chiasso and was greeted by Mario – my Milanese driver for the past 26 years. To mark our anniversary Mario managed to get us to the centre of Milan in a symbolic 26 minutes (normally it’s 45) and, after a few sharp lefts and rights, dropped me at the hotel for the start of a whirlwind 36 hours of presentations, meetings and general catch-ups. Here are a few notes from the road.
1. Testing my nerves
Would more people be inclined to do PCR tests if it wasn’t quite so unpleasant? I’ve been brain-scraped about a dozen times in the past year and while some doctors and technicians know what they’re doing, most have a similar touch to the apprentice your builder might hire to scour the paint off your ceilings. Italy requires a test going into the country (ditto Switzerland on the return) but the Guardia di Finanza didn’t even pay us a second look driving through the border, and on the train back there was no sign of the Swiss border police. If countries are going to have everyone follow along and be taken seriously then they should show more tooth or not bother with the measures.
2. The show must go on
Milan is having a slimmed-down, low-key version of its usual fashion week but the city was nevertheless perky, energetic and alive. For sure, 20C and sunny skies helped pack out the cafés and terraces but this was the first time in a year that I’d seen real commerce in action – wares being displayed, press releases distributed, baubles being fingered. (Stop it! You know what I mean!) Events were being held all over the city, temperatures were taken at every entrance and while some of the safety measures were a bit odd, it did the trick. It’s three months till the Venice Architecture Biennale is supposed to get underway and if Milan’s efforts this weekend are anything to go by then Venice can confidently put on a good show.
3. Masking a problem
If I was particularly cynical and resided full-time in conspiracy corner I might well believe that Italy’s textile industry was responsible for the “you must be masked at all times unless you’re having a cigarette, sitting in a café, chatting on the phone, running with your dog or riding your bike” rule. That said, I also sensed a different level of fear amongst many Milanese. A couple of people said that after a year of lockdown they were now scared of travelling, while another said they were nervous being around people who were not wearing masks – even though they weren’t breaking any rules by doing so on the ski slope. It reveals that opening up is going to be tricky, as a year of heavy measures in some countries have already left psychological ticks and created a climate of total risk aversion. With so many different and conflicting rules about distance, plexi-protection, hotel-room decontamination, mask-here-no-mask-there, curfews and much more, someone needs to take the lead in creating a simple rulebook that countries and companies can follow, particularly as people start to mobilise over the coming months.
4. Double-masking: also a problem
Fashion and media people are supposedly notorious spreaders of the virus and it’s for this reason that we were asked to “double-mask” when entering the HQ of a globally renowned fashion brand. I also know this to be true because food-delivery cyclists and couriers didn’t have to “double-mask” and therefore don’t carry the virus – just salads and urgent fabric samples. If you’re in need of a proper workout then take an FFP2 mask, plus your regular daily-use mask, pop them on top of each other, forego the opportunity to take the lift, climb the endless flight of stairs and then try to explain your media plans for 2021 in a very large room where everyone is seated so far apart that you have to crank up your volume, but no one can hear you scream.
5. The pasta-and-wine divide
This week, Switzerland opted to keep its restaurants closed for another month: perhaps one of its least popular decisions of the past year. In many parts of Italy, however, restaurants are open. It’s no surprise that this causes considerable border friction as Milan’s restaurants welcome gastro-day tourists from across Switzerland while operators in Lugano and Zürich can only curse the federal government while watching loyal customers enjoying themselves down the track in Como and Milan. This same situation is playing out in other border regions across Europe and requires a fix that creates a level playing field for all businesses looking for a smooth path back to normal. All that said, I don’t think a plate of pasta and glass of wine at A Santa Lucia ever tasted quite so good. Cin-cin.