THE FASTER LANE / TYLER BRÛLÉ
Loaded questions
It’s been a while since I’ve hosted a Sunday morning quiz so why don’t you settle in properly before I fire off the questions. Go fix (or order) another coffee, make another round of toast, let the dog out, send the kids down to the shop for the papers and maybe switch on Monocle 24 so you can catch up with this column’s audio sibling. If you forget how this goes, it’s all pretty straightforward. I’ve prepared ten questions and all you need to do is come up with the sharpest, wittiest answers and send them back to me.
The best answers will be published in a special edition of this dispatch next Sunday and the prizes are as follows: third prize is a monogrammed set of Leuchtturm1917 x Monocle notebooks in three useful sizes; second prize is a copy of The Monocle Book of Italy; and the top prize is, wait for it, a chic luggage combo (our special-edition Ace wheely cabin case and accompanying tote) for all that travelling you’ve been dreaming about for the past 12 months. Ready? Remember to keep answers short and sharp; the contest closes at 19.00 CET on Monday and you can direct your answers to me at tb@monocle.com. Here we go.
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If you’re a resident near Hyde Park in London or spend much time in an urban environment where horses can clatter down the street en route to use urban green spaces you’ll be familiar with this little tableau. It’s Saturday morning, you’re out walking your dog and a couple of horses pass by on their morning trot. They’re majestic, they’re gleaming in the early spring light and all the morning activity has made their tummies active. As they’re about to cross a main intersection the one in the lead gently lifts its tail and then leaves a steaming mountain range of horse dump across four lanes of a busy street, saving a little extra for the sidewalk. As an obedient, civic-minded dog owner you look on in slack-jawed amazement, clutching your little red poop bags. Why do dog owners get fined for not cleaning up after their pooches but horse-owners are exempt and can let their steeds dump away with great delight?
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After a year where many have existed on a diet of extreme binge viewing, why hasn’t someone created a premium viewing-sans-frontieres service, which recognises that many people have bank accounts outside the countries where they reside, might have temporarily relocated to (are stranded on) the other side of the world or simply want to watch something in a language that might not be on offer in the place they happen to call home? Please note that recommending a VPN service or breaking the law does not count as an answer.
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Is it okay to wear high-waisted, rib-cage-skimming denim if you’re male and over 30? Even over 20?
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What’s the name of our editor in chief’s dog?
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Bonus question: what’s the breed?
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I’m told that Tesla’s vehicles are a joy to drive but why are they so uncomfortable for passengers? (Please note: if you disagree with this truth, you’re disqualified from the competition.)
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What happened to the kale boom? Are there millions of hectares of empty fields? And what about all those skipping ropes that were purchased about nine months ago?
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We’ve heard a lot of “the home office is here to stay; the traditional office is dead”. In ten words or less, what would a typical Monocle response be to this?
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Why is our London hub called Midori House?
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Finally, Monocle is lining up its next Quality of Life Conference. Where’s it taking place?
Winners will appear here next week.